FIRE JOE MORGAN: Scooper Bowl I

FIRE JOE MORGAN

Where Bad Sports Journalism Came To Die

FJM has gone dark for the foreseeable future. Sorry folks. We may post once in a while, but it's pretty much over. You can still e-mail dak, Ken Tremendous, Junior, Matthew Murbles, or Coach.

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Monday, July 18, 2005

 

Scooper Bowl I

Do you guys like poetry? Maybe you'll like Scoop Jackson.

Here's how he starts his latest article:

"I can see the Sox in the World Series, but I can't FEEL them in it."
-- White Sox fan Mario Smith

CHICAGO -- The feeling is invisible, but omnipresent. The feeling is baseless, but full of substance. The feeling is fleeting, but growing larger with every victory.

The feeling is empty.

The feeling might never disappear.

* * * * *

>> The stars are sic.

That's not the point of this post, though. Read the following paragraph:

"It's my turn now" means Jermaine Dye is about to play like he did when he was with Oakland. It means the three pitchers we have in the bullpen (including the once-invincible Orlando Hernandez) must keep their ERAs under 2.00. It means the once-incredible Frank Thomas keeps hitting 11 home runs for every 76 at-bats. It means Scott Podsednik cannot fall off his first-half MVP-caliber performance. It means Tadahito Iguchi makes SI's Tom Verducci look like a genius for calling him the AL Rookie of the Year at the midpoint.

>> Is there a sentence that sticks out to you? There should be.

Hint: It includes the words Scott Podsednik and the acronym MVP.
Bonus hint: I bolded it and put it in a super big font.

Could we stop talking about borderline All-Star Scott Podsednik like he's Winston Churchill? He's been a solid leadoff hitter this year. That's it. He's not magically injecting Go Get 'Em Juice into the the rest of the team's veins. Guys aren't saying, "Hey, little Scotty's really busting his balls out there -- I think I'll go pitch a complete game three-hitter."

Podsednik's OPS this year is a robust .719, putting him in the territory of such luminaries as Marco Scutaro (.720) and Nick Green (.732). Don't know who Marco Scutaro and Nick Green are? You're a good person, and you probably shouldn't be reading this site.

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posted by Junior  # 9:53 PM
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