FIRE JOE MORGAN: Pete Rose Redux

FIRE JOE MORGAN

Where Bad Sports Journalism Came To Die

FJM has gone dark for the foreseeable future. Sorry folks. We may post once in a while, but it's pretty much over. You can still e-mail dak, Ken Tremendous, Junior, Matthew Murbles, or Coach.

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Thursday, August 04, 2005

 

Pete Rose Redux

Wow. Just as I'm about to post this Ryne Sandberg nugget about Pete Rose, Murbles posts about Sandberg's mortal enemy's stance on Rose.

Surprise! They agree! They both have a lot of good things to say about a man who damaged the integrity of the game.

Why?

One word: RESPECTFORTHEGAME.

Morgan and Sandberg love Rose because he was a hard-nosed, gritty, tough sonofabitch who played the game the right way. About Rose, Sandberg had this to say:

Pete Rose was an unreal hitter. He made his mistakes, but his mistakes were off the playing field. Nobody will ever be able to prove that his gambling ever affected an outcome of a game that he played or managed. He realizes his mistake and it would be a shame to not allow him in the Hall. And to talk about "respect for the game" – nobody loved the game more or played the game "the right way" better.

>> A reader had the temerity to ask why Sandberg mentioned Rose in his Hall of Fame speech centered around "respect for the game." Apparently, loving the game (who the hell doesn't love the game? I guess hockey aficionado Keith Foulke?) and playing the game "the right way" (his quotes, not mine) supercede gambling on the outcome of games you're managing.

I don't even have a joke about how crazy that is.

I have, however, assembled the following helpful chart:

THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE/THINGS RESPECT THE GAME AND PLAY SAID GAME THE RIGHT WAY:

Pete Rose (and Presumably, All People Who Have Gambled on the Game)
Derek Jeter
David Eckstein/Scott Podsednik/Any Small or Fast Player
Any Member of Any Championship Team Ever
Anyone Who Knows How to Win
Anyone Who Played Before 1975
Bunts
Not Trying to Do Too Much With It
Steals
Productive Outs
Fast People
Good-Fielding SS
Guys Who Get Their Uniforms Dirty
Pitches Who Throw Hard and/or Stare Menacingly at Batters When on the Mound
Bench Coaches ("Good Baseball Men")
Intangibles
Awareness of the Game
GMs Who Are Former Players
Guys With Junk on Their Helmets Specifically Along With Perhaps Other Parts of Their Uniforms (Trot Nixon Corollary)
Captains (See Jeter, Derek and Varitek, Jason)
Hit and Runs
The National League
Being Aggressive
Ron Gardenhire
Jack McKeon
Desire
Guts
Guile
"Catalysts"
Table-Setters
Chemistry
Gold Gloves
Veterans

THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE/THINGS DO NOT RESPECT THE GAME, PLUS THEY PLAY SAID GAME IN A WEIRD, INCORRECT WAY:

Steroid Users (Evil)
Adam Dunn
Mark Bellhorn
The Oakland Athletics
Computers
Walks
Home Runs
Trying to Do Too Much With It
Pitch Counts
Large Men Who Clog Up the Basepaths
On-Base Percentage
Anyone Who Uses Numbers to Make Baseball Arguments
Young GMs
Guys Who Hit .304 Last Year But Who Are Only Hitting .278 This Year (!)
Guys Who Don't Intentionally Always Hit the Ball to the Right Side of the Infield With a Runner on Second and No Outs No Matter What the Game Situation Is
Slow People

Designated Hitters
No-Field 1B
Striking Out Too Much
Chokers
Head Cases
VORP, WARP, Win Shares, UZR

---

Feel free to contribute to these lists. I've missed many, many items.

Labels: ,


posted by Junior  # 10:21 PM
Comments:
To List #1 I add:

1. Fast People
2. Good-Fielding SS
3. Guys Who Get Their Uniforms Dirty
4. Pitches Who Throw Hard and/or Stare Menacingly at Batters When on the Mound
5. Bench Coaches ("Good Baseball Men")
6. Intangibles
7. Awareness of the Game

To List #2 I add:

1. Young GMs
2. Guys Who Hit .304 Last Year But Who Are Only Hitting .278 This Year (!)
3. Guys Who Don't Intentionally Always Hit the Ball to the Right Side of the Infield With a Runner on Second and No Outs No Matter What the Game Situation Is
4. Slow People

Thanks for doing this, Jr. My favorite post of the year. Let's keep adding, and as we do, you should update the post.
 
Great additions. I've updated the post with yours and some more of my own.

Enjoy, America!
 
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