FIRE JOE MORGAN: FJM's Mathematically-Minded Baseball Person of the Month

FIRE JOE MORGAN

Where Bad Sports Journalism Came To Die

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Tuesday, March 07, 2006

 

FJM's Mathematically-Minded Baseball Person of the Month

is Dutch Daulton, former Phillie Catcher and Professional Weirdo.

Dutch, it turns out, is totally into the so-called "new wave" of statistical analysis. To wit:

"Reality is created and guarded by numeric patterns that overlap and awaken human consciousness, like a giant matrix or hologram," writes the .245 lifetime hitter. "They are created by sacred geometry -- numbers, the language of the universe, codes of awakening -- such as 11:11, which represent twin strands of DNA about to return to balance. Eleven equals BALANCE."

Now that, my friends, is what I call solid reasoning. If only some of these hard-nosed ol' timers would think more like Dutch.

Read more of Daulton's metamathematical musings in this article, which is destined to be the wellspring whence will emerge a "Moneyball"-like project for crazy people.

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