FIRE JOE MORGAN: Eighteen Men Walk In. Sixteen Walk Out.


Where Bad Sports Journalism Came To Die

FJM has gone dark for the foreseeable future. Sorry folks. We may post once in a while, but it's pretty much over. You can still e-mail dak, Ken Tremendous, Junior, Matthew Murbles, or Coach.

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Friday, December 07, 2007


Eighteen Men Walk In. Sixteen Walk Out.

Not really. Those would be exciting backyard brawl rules, though, wouldn't they? Anyway, it's being reported here (and quoted on Baseball Think Factory here) that eighteen web writers were nominated for membership in the Baseball Writers Association of America. You may remember the BBWAA as the organization who voted Justin Morneau and Andre Dawson to be MVPs because adorably, kind of like a puppy who destroys your favorite sweater, it just didn't know any better.

Sixteen of the eighteen writers got in. Not bad, huh? But wait: who were the two unluckies who didn't quite cut the baseball-flavored mustard? None other than Rob Neyer and Keith Law, two men of reason.

Let that sink in, and I will regale you with excerpts from columns by Jim Caple, who did get in to the BBWAA:

Chumps pay $25 for parking. Cheapskates take public transportation, which provides valuable life lessons for the children:

"Daddy, why is that man talking to himself, picking at his sores and not wearing any pants?"

"Because he roots for the Cubs, son."

Haw haw haw! Baseball! Stomach sore from laughing? Better take some Aleve and get a load of some more hilarious baseball talk:

Harry Potter reveals the truth!

There also is no school called Hogwarts, at least, not that I ever went to. I went to Malfoy Academy and our team nickname was the Warthogs so I guess Rowling thought she was being real clever by changing it around. And it ain't no school for wizards, neither. It's a private school founded by the Malfoy family, who made a fortune in something much worse than black magic -- tobacco.

I'm so psyched this guy will be eligible for a Hall of Fame vote in the future, along with our good friend Jon Heyman. The Hall is in good hands, people.

The BBWAA is clearly an organization all about change, adaptability and flexibility. Check out their state of the art web presence. I'm pretty sure the only way we could improve our own nearly flawless, aesthetically pleasing design is to adopt their eye-catching neon green and web-link-standard-blue color scheme.

Mr. Neyer, Mr. Law: you are not "beat" enough to be beat writers for the BBWAA. You do not spend enough time smelling players' sweat and managers' chaw. Your brand of writing -- writing about facts, information, and data -- will not be tolerated within their ranks. Gentlemen: congratulations.

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posted by Junior  # 6:29 PM
Irving Janis, the now-deceased Yale research psychologist who was an expert on the topic of 'groupthink,' wrote that groups with high levels of cohesiveness tend to reject dissidents that question their norms. While that may seem obvious, the more interesting phenomenon is something called polarization, wherein the collective view of the group is far more extreme than the views of individual members. Moderates find themselves adopting either excessively conservative or excessively risky positions in order to preserve group norms, even to the detriment of the 'work at hand.' As a result, and I'm quoting here from Janis' seminal 1972 work Victims of Groupthink: A psychological study of foreign-policy decisions and fiascoes, groups tend to "develop stereotyped images that dehumanize out-groups against whom they are engaged in competitive struggles." Think about that the next time one of these douchebags calls Bill James a computer.

a) The BBWA isn't any more stupid than all of the other stupid groups that implement ill-informed, biased, and detrimental decision-making strategies, and
b) Neyer and Law, bless their hearts, don't stand a snowball's chance next year, the year after, etc.
I fell asleep fifty separate times while reading that comment. But I think I get what you mean.
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