FIRE JOE MORGAN: You Just Don't Say Things Like That About The Woonsocket Rocket

FIRE JOE MORGAN

Where Bad Sports Journalism Came To Die

FJM has gone dark for the foreseeable future. Sorry folks. We may post once in a while, but it's pretty much over. You can still e-mail dak, Ken Tremendous, Junior, Matthew Murbles, or Coach.

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Sunday, March 16, 2008

 

You Just Don't Say Things Like That About The Woonsocket Rocket

I was actually kinda shocked by this one. Kevin Hench has decided to take some shots at Rocco Baldelli on his "Hit List."

Baldelli has appeared in 127 of a possible 486 games the last three seasons. And — surprise! — he will begin this season on the disabled list. His latest DL-inducing "injury" is exhaustion.

"Well, Rocco, we've been looking over the tests."
"And? What is it, doc? Give it to me straight."
"SURPRISE! You have an extremely rare combination of metabolic and mitochrondrial abnormalities, which prevent the muscles in your legs from working and recovering properly."

Baldelli's condition is straight up unfunny. Doctors still haven't pinpointed the nature of his disease, but they know that it will affect his ability to perform the most basic of baseball skills. He's 26 years old, and his once promising career is probably over. And Kevin Hench is going to put the word "injury" in quotes? As if it's fake? Are you fucking kidding me?

Who does he think he is, Mariah Carey?

I prefer Julio Lugo's response:
“I read it in the newspaper and my heart dropped,” he said.

Again, there is nothing funny about this. Kevin Hench owes Rocco Baldelli an apology. Simple as that.

And what is he exhausted from, the off-season?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no his mitochondria aren't working properly.

Labels: ,


posted by dak  # 5:21 PM
Comments:
Thanks to reader Jack B. for the heads-up.
 
Kevin Hench is -- surprise! -- a douchebag. Boi-oi-oi-oi-oi-inggggg! (sprays selzer water at Kevin Hench)
 
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