That's DOCTOR Morgan to You, Nerd.

Deal with this.

It seems like Joe has done a lot of good things in terms of education in his community. However, this criterion:

"This degree is awarded to one who has demonstrated intellectual and humane values that are consistent with the aims of higher education, and with the highest ideals of a person's chosen field," Mohammad H. Qayoumi, Cal State East Bay president, said in a statement.

[emphasis mine] does not seem to jibe very well with this:

Joe: I don't read books like that. I didn't read Bill James' book, and you said he was complimenting me. Why would I wanna read a book about a computer, that gives computer numbers?

Me: It's not about a computer.

Joe: Well, I'm not reading the book, so I wouldn't know.

Me: I'm not --

Joe: Why would I wanna read the book? All I'm saying is, I see a game every day. I watch baseball every day. I have a better understanding about why things happen than the computer, because the computer only tells you what you put in it. I could make that computer say what I wanted it to say, if I put the right things in there. ... The computer is only as good as what you put in it. How do you think we got Enron?

Apparently, the intellectual values that are the aims of higher education involve:

* not reading books
* criticizing the books you haven't read
* disparaging research
* being snooty about people who read books and do research

Congratulations, Cal State East Bay! Excellent choice for an honorary doctorate.

(One more, for old time's sake:

He is talking about the 2002 world-champion Anaheim Angels, but what he's really talking about is the book Moneyball (a book Joe Morgan hasn't read) and why it's bullshit (which is why he'll never read it). I try to point out the contradiction. "I think you should --"

Morgan cuts me off. "No, I shouldn't read the book. 'Cause I don't care about the book.")