FIRE JOE MORGAN: You're Welcome, Darin Erstad


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Monday, April 02, 2007


You're Welcome, Darin Erstad

We've just reverse-jinxed you into a two-run homer in your first at bat as a White Sox! This is all the more remarkable when you consider that this scruffy-bearded tough sonofabitch has only gone yard 18 times in the last four seasons combined.

That's not stopping guys like Dave van Dyck from writing amazing paragraphs like these about Erstad:

With Darin Erstad, what you see is literally what you get: Toughened scruffy-growth-of-beard exterior, jaw-jutting determined look, forward-slant walk and all-out run.

You literally get a guy with a beard. You literally get a guy with a serious look. This guy literally runs. He leans forward when he walks. Literally.

He literally has had an above-average EqA once in the last six years.

Just like Jim Thome, the major White Sox lineup addition of 2006, Darin Erstad is a Midwest work-ethic, lunch-pail, down-to-earth guy. And one coming off an injury-plagued year with something to prove.

Good Christ, it's like Dave van Dyck has been reading this site and punched in every cliche we've made fun of over the last two years.

determined look
forward-slant walk
all-out run

You forgot "blue-collar." Also: "white."

Let's compare Jim Thome to Darin Erstad anonymously and EqA-ly, since 2001:


2001 .342
2002 .367
2003 .322
2004 .314
2005 .259
2006 .337


2001 .252
2002 .256
2003 .241
2004 .274
2005 .259
2006 .219

Yep, pretty much the same guy. Both guys worked hard (said in the same tone of voice Rasheed Wallace uses when he says "Both teams played hard.")

"I think Darin Erstad is going to make a lot of difference in this ballclub, just the way he goes about his business," manager Ozzie Guillen said.

Then he is everything Guillen thought after watching him for years with the Angels?

"Oh, my God, yes," he said. "I know the way he played. I didn't know his body would be in that great of condition to perform the way he has. He went through every drill, played every game without complaining.

Whenever he is asked to perform a basic fielding drill, Jermaine Dye always cries and pulls out an actual baby's pacifier, screaming "Dye no field today!" in a histrionic whine. This goes on for about forty-five minutes or until Dye falls asleep on the field.

"I'd like to prove to myself I can stay healthy and play the way I want to play and all that good stuff. The internal motivation is not lacking."

No one ever has doubted that of the tough kid who grew up in North Dakota.

Darin Erstad: good at baseball because he grew up on the mean streets of North Dakota. Once you've experienced the living nightmare that is Jamestown, ND, you're just thankful to wake up without an AK pointed down your throat.

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posted by Junior  # 4:18 PM
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