FIRE JOE MORGAN: I'll Watch "Dead Poets Society" on TCM; You'll Do Our Work For Us


Where Bad Sports Journalism Came To Die

FJM has gone dark for the foreseeable future. Sorry folks. We may post once in a while, but it's pretty much over. You can still e-mail dak, Ken Tremendous, Junior, Matthew Murbles, or Coach.

Main / Archives / Merch / Glossary / Goodbye

Monday, July 23, 2007


I'll Watch "Dead Poets Society" on TCM; You'll Do Our Work For Us

Hooray! Gallimaufry time! What better way to start the week?

Plenty of action for the Sunday night game on ESPN. Reader Colleen starts us off:
According to Joe Morgan, Adam Kennedy has "always been a great offensive player."

He has a career OPS+ of 89.
So true. So simple. Reader Evan L. noticed the same thing, but pointed instead to AK's .261 career EQA.

Maybe Joe meant: relative to all other human beings, Adam Kennedy has always been a great offensive player? As you may know, I like to give Joe the benefit of the doubt whenever possible.

Okay! Over on TCM, Charlie Dalton just changed his name to Nuwanda. And back at the FJM inbox, a number of readers noticed Joe Morgan's total misread of an ump's call on a stolen base attempt. We'll go with David S.'s version of events because he seemslike a good dude:
rolen steals 2nd, called safe, morgan says "easily safe" when crowd boos. they go to the replay that shows rolen CLEARLY out, morgan again says "easily safe." then they freeze it with rolen being tagged while nowhere near the bag, and both announcers are dead silent until the next pitch.
A quick pause to remind our dear readers that Gallimaufry is brought to you each and every week by Bacon Salt. Bacon Salt: Tastes like bacon...and salt!

Reader Mike mustered enough strength to listen to the voice of Suzyn Waldman, and for that, we congratulate him with a post of his observation:
During last night's Yankees broadcast, Waldman and John Sterling were talking about the possibility of Luis Vizcaino notching the win in both ends of the doubleheader. Sterling quipped that he could be the modern-day Wilbur Wood. This was Waldman's reply: "For those who don't know, Wilbur Wood used to start, and win, both ends of a doubleheader. A lot."

Only twice did Wood start both ends of a doubleheader. Never did he win both ends. In fact, in his most famous double-dip appearance, he took the collar two losses on the same day against the Yankees.
I just found out that Suzyn Waldman is from Newton, Massachusetts. Weird, right?

Also, say what you will about Mr. Keating's teaching methods. This guy really inspires his students. Sometimes you just gotta say "fuck the heck," right?

On with the 'maufry! Bruce Torres writes FJM to say:

Want to find someone to sleep with living near by?
91% of our members already gotten some action with the help of our system..

Well guess what? it won't even cost you a penny,

It's all here

Okay, Bruce! Good to know.

Reader Matthew K. writes for no reason other than to add to the ever-growing list of Eckstein nicknames:
David Husslehoff
Sure. Why not. Add it to the list. I'd go with "Hustlehoff," maybe, but...oh fuck -- I think Robert Sean Leonard's character is about to kill himself.

Reader Rick N. has an interesting thought on the ongoing "Who's Now?" situation:

dude, who's now would be brilliant if it were advertised as satire.
dude, maybe.

Actually, nothing blew my mind more about the whole "Who's Now" thing than the fact that Barry Bonds lost in the first round. I know it was up to the voters, and not ESPN itself, but seriously: every Bonds at bat is televised by ESPN. He dominates the front page of Pedro Gomez pops up every fifteen minutes to tell me whether or not Bonds made a doody. He's about to break the all-time HR record -- and he's less "now" than Jeff Gordon? I don't get it.

And lastly, Lt. J.J. K. points us to this take on Joe Morgan's relation to the Sheffield/Torre/RealSports nonsense.

I'm not sure exactly what to make of it, but the author certainly doesn't like Joe Morgan. And I like that!

"O Captain My Captain!" You tell 'em, Ethan Hawke's character!

Labels: , , , , , ,

posted by dak  # 4:41 AM
Comments: Post a Comment

<< Home


04.05   05.05   06.05   07.05   08.05   09.05   10.05   11.05   12.05   01.06   02.06   03.06   04.06   05.06   06.06   07.06   08.06   09.06   10.06   11.06   12.06   01.07   02.07   03.07   04.07   05.07   06.07   07.07   08.07   09.07   10.07   11.07   12.07   01.08   02.08   03.08   04.08   05.08   06.08   07.08   08.08   09.08   10.08   11.08  

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?