FIRE JOE MORGAN: Joseph Leonard "Chat" Morgan


Where Bad Sports Journalism Came To Die

FJM has gone dark for the foreseeable future. Sorry folks. We may post once in a while, but it's pretty much over. You can still e-mail dak, Ken Tremendous, Junior, Matthew Murbles, or Coach.

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Thursday, September 20, 2007


Joseph Leonard "Chat" Morgan


Matt (Brooklyn, NY): Mike Mussina. Wow, what a comeback! How on earth did he get his fastball up to 90 again? Will he or Hughes, or Kennedy (who has also been impressive), be in the postseason rotation?

Joe Morgan:
I talked to Joe Torre before the game on Sunday and he has no idea what the rotation will be. And I have no ideas how he got his fastball back up there between starts, but he did and won the game.

Ken Tremendous: I like it when he's brash. I have no idea! Beats me! And as for the issue of the Yankees' postseason rotation -- I'm not even going to guess! Name as many people as you want -- Mussina, Hughes, Kennedy...I'm not going to guess on even one person. Because I don't have to. Because there are no repercussions for my actions. Next, please.

Derrick Cleveland Ohio:
Did Cleveland basically clinch it last night? First Cavs, here comes the Tribe, and let's go Browns!

Joe Morgan:
Well no one has clinched, but they are in better position and if you are a betting man you are feeling good about Cleveland. But Cleveland could lose a couple here, so don't get ahead of yourself. Obviously Cleveland looks good, but the Mets looked good a week ago.

KT: Yes, let's not get ahead of ourselves. For example, this site says that there is only a 99.96% chance of the Indians making the playoffs. So be cool, everyone. No celebrating yet.

Mr. Met (Queens, NY):
Can you come teach my Mets how to play defense Mr. Morgan?

Joe Morgan:
Too late to teach them! Defense is like hitting, it is contagious.

KT: Finish this old-school SAT question.

Defense is like _________. It is contagious.

A. pink eye
B. seeing someone yawning and then yawning yourself
C. a contagion
D. Something that is not "contagious," like "hitting."

When you make mistakes pressure builds up. But it comes down to the individual and his ability to concetrate.

Okay, I'm not altering these at all. And I think -- as I asked in last week's chat -- that Joe believes the word is "concetrate."

Right now the Mets are not concetrating


well on the task at hand. But if you look at the Mets, their offense is giving them the lead, even with the Phillies, and they just can't hold it. That is where the problem lies.

I think their problem lies in the fact that they're trying to concetrate, which is not a thing, and it's frustrating them because it isn't a thing you can do.

Adam, NY:
Should Eric Gagne make the Red Sox post-season roster?

Joe Morgan:
They put him in that position, and if they are not going to have him on the roster they better make the change today. You cannot let him pitch till the end of the season and then insert someone else in there, who is not used to that position. So if that is what you have to do, do it now, because the new pitcher needs to feel comfortable there.

KT: Good thing they have Okajima, who was the 8th inning guy all year. And Mike Timlin, who was the 8th inning guy for years before that. And Delcarmen, who has pitched in the 8th inning before. So, good analysis -- you only failed to mention three other options they have.

Josh W NY, NY:
Who is going to win the NL West - Arizona or San Diego?

Joe Morgan:
Well I do not have a crystal ball.

KT: What?! Then what is the point of these chats? I thought the whole point was that you were the one human in the world who could literally divine the future. That's what it says on the ESPN InSider page -- here, look:
Wednesday, September 19

The Morning Buzz, 10 a.m.

Fantasy sports w/ Eric Karabell, 11 a.m.

NFL with Christ Mortensen, 11 a.m.

MLB Hall of Famer and Crystal Ball Owner and Augurer and Knower of That Which Is To Come; He Who Sees Forward, He Who
Knows Forward, He Whose Pliant Mind Stretches Hither and Yon Across the Yawning Chasms of Time, He Who Is Everywhere and Nowhere and Somewhere... Joe Morgan, 11:15 a.m.
Page 2's DJ Gallo, Noon.

Diego San Juan, Puerto Rico: Who do you like for the AL Cy Young Award?

Joe Morgan:
I would say Beckett, Sabbathia, and Lackey are my top three. And as with the MVP, whoever steps up down the stretch will probably get it. And the great thing is that all three of them are playing in meaningful games. All these guys have to win games in order to ensure their team's success.

KT: Up-to-the-second chances the following teams make the playoffs:

Indians: 99.965
Red Sox: 99.967
Angels: 99.932

Time for Beckett, Sabbathia, and Lackey to step up!

Ryan (NJ): When is Manny Ramirez expected back? He could certainly jump-start the Red Sox just in time for the playoffs...

Joe Morgan: Manny's absence is the reason they are struggling. In clutch, tough sitautions, Manny is the guy you want there along with Ortiz. The young kids looked good for a while but Manny need to be in the lineup for them to be a championship team. I am not sure when he will be back; I heard Thursday, but I am not sure.

KT: Who's your source on that? Because the Sox are off Thursday. But thanks for the update.

dave (milwaukee): No Prince Fielder for NL MVP? Taking nothing away from the other 3 who are all great. But the man is not only putting up huge numbers but he is that teams leader.

Joe Morgan:
You are 100% correct. Today's my birthday and I am older and I went blank. I agree with you 100%.

KT: How am I going to work in that it's my birthday?
How am I going to work in that it's my birthday?
How am I going to work in that it's my birthday?
How am I going to work in that it's my birthday?
There it is! The opportunity! Go!

Joe Morgan: Thanks for chatting with me today. I am looking forward to some great finishes as the season draws a close. Chat with you next week!

KT: Fine with me.

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